Sometimes I question my ability to blog.
I can spend hours thinking about a post, how I’ll find the perfect balance between funny, ironic and plain dumb to craft a masterpiece of self-reflexion. I can write and rewrite a draft until the event it’s based on is now a thing of the past. Sometimes I just post some Batman & Joker comic.
But seriously, the bests posts are always the ones that are written by others. Case in point, my morning routine consists of making my way to Tim Hortons and while buying a coffee (and sometimes a bagel with cream cheese), I chit-chat with my FavoriteCashier. This morning exchange was surreal.
Me: So, how’s my favorite cashier this morning?
FC: I’m grumpy, so don’t bug me today!
She sounds rough, but she’s adorable, really. Well, at this point of the story.
Me: Oh so this means I shouldn’t annoy you too much today then…
As I’m saying this, I poke her shoulder repeatedly – poke, poke, poke, poke, poke, poke, poke.
FC: Nah, you’re not annoying. I just didn’t sleep well last night.
Me: I’m sorry to hear tha-
FC: My roomate started her cancer treatments, and I was up all night.
Now I’m thinking: Shit! I’m annoying someone who spent the night up with a friend. Idiot.
Me: Well hopefully she’ll get better soon.
FC: She coughed all night long, keeping me up! I am not pleased!
Me: …
FC: I need my sleep!
Me: Have a nice day.
+++++
Maybe I should’ve closed with “I hope she dies quickly then!”… I’m telling you, I couldn’t make up that stuff.
Which brings me to:
What is the weirdest experience you ever had with somebody in the service industry? Did the sommelier offer to join you and the four girls you’re having dinner with for a post dinner drink? Did the mechanic offer to change your oil? Did the cashier told you she wished her roommate died?
Mikey
How dare that cancer-ridden bitch interrupt her roommate’s sleep! Some people.
.-= Finn´s last blog ..Below =-.
Holy crap! I don’t know whether to laugh or…what. Finn said it best lol.
.-= Sarcastica´s last blog ..Of videos and huge ass needles =-.
I love Mikey Tuesday…an homage is an awesome thing, dude! One time at the grocery store, the bagger girl was sucking on a lolly and told the cashier she’d do the same for him later. I was like, ummmm…is this really happening? Here? At the register?
.-= Hilly´s last blog ..Interlude… =-.
@Finn: Well, she might have an opening soon… Would you like me to put in a good word for you?
@Sarcastica: If only you had seen my face. You’d still be laughing I’m sure.
@Hilly: Funny thing: I originally wrote “Homage kisses”. How did you know? And how long were you a bagger girl?
Why is it that “Tim Hortons” isn’t possessive? It should be “Tim Horton’s,” shouldn’t it? I noticed the spelling this past week when I was up your way and thought it might be a Canadian thing. This morning I took a look at our T-Ho’s and noticed it was plural rather than possessive. I know it’s not because you guys are afraid of extraneous punctuation (or even vowels) — especially the French Canadians.
I’m not sure this is weird, and I’ve recently blogged about it, but the oddball service thing that comes to mind is when I pulled into a Wendy’s (<– possessive… as if owned by a person named "Wendy"… and in Canada… and connected to a Tim Hortons (which sounds like it might be a building full of guys named "Tim Horton")) and started my order by saying "I'd like four chocolate milks," and before I could continue with anything else the order taker said, "That'll be $2.30, please pull around" as if she were used to people coming in and ordering only chocolate milk. When I said, "… and three singles," she gave me the total and told me to "Please pull around." She did the same thing for each thing I added.
Now that I think about it, last week at McDonald's (<– again. And, again, in Canada) I was in the Drive Thru and started with, "I'd like two Egg McMuffins" and before I could say anything about hash browns or coffee was told, "That'll be $4.15, please pull around."
[BTW, all the dollar values are things I made up. The only real food-item price I remember are for Fruit & Yogurt parfaits... they're $1.98 up there.]
Hahahaha
I have had so many, and especially with bartenders, that I am not even sure where to begin!
Maybe the time I heard two chicks who worked at Walgreen’s talking about their yeast infections. That was fun. ny.
Not.
@Dèlmour: Funny thing about the “Horton’s / Hortons” thing. I originally wrote “Horton’s” but then I looked at the cup and saw that it was indeed “Hortons”. Yes, Tim Hortons was founded by Canadian hockey player Tim Horton and Jim Charade. Wendy’s was actually named after Dave Thomas’ fourth child Melinda Lou “Wendy” Thomas. That’ll be 12.95$, please pull around.
@Sybil Law: That sounds like one or twelve blog posts, no?