I hate this feeling.
It started innocently with a long lost friend sending me one of those annoying chain letters. Except this time, instead of automatically hitting “delete” with a vengeance, I replied, erasing the whole message and leaving in the body this simple query:
How are you?
And then I waited. You see, I had tried this approach a few months back, with no reply from Snuggle. I assumed at the time that he might not want to talk to me, if he felt he had nothing good to report. So I felt bad for a while, and things being what they are I promptly forgot about it and went on with my life.
The thruth is I never forget, I just pretend to. Sometimes I stay up at night thinking about Snuggle. How every time we talk, e-mail or visit, there’s always something bad going on. How every time he doesn’t reply or pick up the phone, it’s something worst. So I waited. I told myself he was probably doing fine. I didn’t believe a word of what I was thinking. But I hoped.
Then it came. A reply.
Things are not going well. Every paragraph is worst then the previous one. I thought it was bad at line one, I couldn’t stand reading line 15, and it took me a good hour to gather the courage to make it to the end. And there it was. The last line of Snuggle’s reply:
And you? How are things with your Wife, Kids, Job? Summer projects, vacations? When will you be in town?
Damn.
I know I complain a lot on this blog, but most of you know that I do this because it’s much more fun to write about getting cut in traffic or getting peed on or stickin it to the bitch at the Tim Horton’s then about all the nice stuff, right? I admit that the “I have a new SUV” series was fun to write about. The bottom line is that I live a fairly happy life. I have a great Wife – she really is Lovely with a capital L – amazing kids, a really cool job, a decent house that is almost paid for, and did I mention a new SUV? I don’t have many worries, and I really enjoy the financial freedom that we have as a family and that I have as an individual. I never worry about running out of money for groceries, and when I want a Wii, a new computer, a digital camera or a motorcycle, I just go out and buy them. And yes, it could all happen on the same day. I am a happy guy.
Back to the complaining now.
What am I supposed to reply to my friend? Hey, it sucks to hear about your life, but I’m doing extra-grrrrrrrreat myself. Here’s all the cool stuff I did recently – why yes, a new job AND a promotion in the same year, and yes we took the whole family to the Dominican Republic and 10 months later to Cuba. Did I mention I have a new SUV?
I felt like an asshole.
I felt like an asshole for having a great life.
I felt like an asshole for feeling like an asshole for having a great life.
So I sat down and wrote all the great things happening with me. Everything about my work, my Wife, my Zadorables, my summer plans, my vacation pans. I didn’t mention the SUV. I mentioned this blog, gave the URL and told Snuggle that today’s post was going to be about him.
I hit send.
So Snuggle my friend, if you read this now you know. I worry about you. I’m in town this weekend. Let’s have beers and talk.
I can pick you up in my new SUV.
